celebrating 200th jokes

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boy n girl

BOY & GIRL in a party BOY-How many sister & brother u have. GIRL-6. BOY-Perents ko aur koi kaam nahi tha kya. GIRL-What about u. BOY-1. GIRL-Baap me dum nahi tha kya.

sms

Condome to kotex: U stop my business for a week in every month. Kotex to condome: If u make 1 misteke i loose my business for 9 months bloody.

junior

Love is gamble,Sex is gem,Boys do the fucking,Girls get the pian,1 Night of pleasure,9 Months pian,1 Boy in d hospital & a junior fucker comes again

sardar

By misteke sardar goes in to ledies toilet,all ledies suddenly stand up. Sardar-IZZAT DIL MAIN HO YAHI KAFI HAI,BAITHO-BAITHO...

mombatti

A girl visits Dr. for urine test,by misteke her report chenges. Dr. tells-U r PREGANANT, Girl says-O GOD! ab to mombatti ka bhi bharosa nahi raha.

english sms

Enter the Password and touch my Heart......
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Sorry!Wrong password,You touch my Lund.Better try again

Man with six babies travelling in a bus,some 1 ask him that "All babies r yours?" Man says "No im working in a condome factory & those are costomers complaints.

After 1st night hubby asks his wife "How do u feel?" Wife says it was dangerous & i hav never seen this size of penis,before u r good instead of my watchman

marathi 101% Non-veg

Atak matak chawli chatak,chawli zali god god tuzya gotila aala fod fod,fod kahi futena lavda kahi uthena goticha fod futla,lavda tuza tutla,zavaicha tras mitla.

marathi non veg

Ek Mulga-Dr.mala normal sandas hot nahi,bhaji khalli ki bhaji padte,chapati khalli ki chapatich padte,bhat khallaa ki bhatach padto,mala normal sandas honya saathi mi kay karu. Dr.-GU KHAA.







Sasra Maza SAAND...Saasu Mazi RAAND...Mi Nawaryache Naav GHETE...Khajvat Mazi GAAND...










Kolhapurchya Shtand Varti Thambli Hoti Rambha...Tikdun Aala Sambha Aani Dabun Gela Aamba...

hindi sms

Ek Raand ki kavita: Mohabbat ke siva aur bhi gum hain jamane me,Mohabbat ke siva aur bhi gam hain jamane me,Kabhi aake dekho CHOOT phat jati hain kamane me.













 


Girl during sex: Mere MOOH me ungali dalo,Meri GAAND me ungali daalo,aah..Meri CHOOT me ungali daalo,
Boy: Bahan ki Laudi ye LUND kya sms padhanewale ke GAAND me daaloo










FIZA Remix song: Mahboob Mehboob mere teri bistar me Mujhe sone de,Bahut doodh hain tere seene me( . )( . ) Mujhe daba daba ke pine de...

son and teacher

Son:Papa 2day i had sex with my teacher Dad:Great,yeah hui na mardo wali baat!Chal party ho jaaye? Son:Aaj nahi papa aaj gaand me bahut dard hain.

panipuri

Girl: Are,itana bada?Mujhame kaise lungi? Boy: Mooh to kholo. Girl: Chee! Saare kapade geele kar diye. Boy:Aur logi? Girl:Na baba,ye PANIPOORI tum hi khao

hindi sms

Sardar's son:5 Rs. do. Sardar:Right jeb se lelo(Jeb phati thi,lund haath me aaya) Son:Nahi hain. Sardar:Left dekh(Fir se phati jeb) Son:Bhosadike paisa 1 nahi aur lund 2-2 rakhata hain.

Ladaka apana lund ladaki ko dikhakar bola "Kya tumhare paas ye hain?" To ladaki apani choot dikate huye boli "Agar hamare paas ye hain to usaki kya kami ho sakati han?"

Arz kiya hain: Rajwade me ud rahe the Ghode, Rajwade me ud rahe the Ghode, Dhyan se kya padha raha hain Laude? kabhi dekhe hain udate Ghode?

Drugiest

Lady to Drugiest: Kya aap 9 inch ka condome bechate ho? Drugiest: Ha,kitane doo? Lady: Muze nahi chahiye,par koi kharidane aayega to use mere ghar ka address de dena.

Madam ne class me pooncha: Dushashan kaun tha? Ladaka: Fuddu tha. Madam: kyon? Ladaka: Saaal sadi ko khich raha tha,utha bhi to sakata tha.

Police Mujrim se: Bachche ki GAAND kyon mari. Mujrim: Janab thand lag rahi thi. Police: Bachcha kaha hain? Mujrim: Woh khush hain aur sms padh raha hain.

sardar

Sardar: Kitane logi? Callgirl: 500 Rs. on bed, 100 Rs. on chatai.Sardar bola: Ok,yeh lo 500 Rs. Callgirl: Wow!On bed...? Sardar bola: Nahi 5 bar chatai par

Asmaan pe jitne sitrare hai, (wah wah) Aankho me jitne ishare hai, (wah wah) Samundar ke jitne kinare hai, (wah wah) Utne hi kide teri GAAND mein hai, (ab bol wah wah).

Ramlal- Thakur saab Gabbarsing ne Bahurani ki izzat lut li hai. Thakur- To? Ramlal-Bahurani puch rahi hai ki Gabbar se badala lena hai ya PAYMENT...!

काय हे !

एकदा एक लग्नाळू मुलगा मुलगी पाहण्यासाठी जातो.

प्राथमिक सोपस्कार (म्हणजे खोटे खोटे स्वागत ,चहापाणी , कांदेपोहे ईत्यादी इत्यादी) पार पडल्यानंतर मुला मुलीला थेट बोलायची संधी मिळते.

नव्या जमान्याप्रमाणे मुलगी जरा फॉरवर्ड असते तीच संभाषणाला सुरूवात करते.

मुलगी : तुला काय येते?

मुलगा : मला घाम येतो !
तुला काय येते?

मुलगी : मला गाता येते !

मुलगा : मग गाऊन दाखव.

मुलगी : गाऊन तर बाहेर वाळत घातला आहे .

मुलगा : मग असूदे, वाळू दे!

ह्यावर ती मुलगी बाहेर जाते व मुठभर वाळू घेऊन येते.
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पुढे काय,असे विचारताय?
 

मुलगा शॉक्स......... मुलगी रॉक्स !!!

पाहुणे !

बंटीच्या घरी आलेले पाहुणे जेवायला बसलेले असताना बंटीमोठ्याने म्हणाला
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“आई, आपल्याकडे आजोबा, आजी आणि आत्या आले आहेत. .
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तू तर म्हणत होतीस की म्हसोबा, सटवी आणि टवळी चरायला येणार  आहेत,
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त्यांच काय झाल ?

लावा बोली !

एके ठिकाणी एका खटारा गाडीची विक्री चालू असते....!!!

लोकं जोरजोरात बोली लावत असतात..!!

१० लाख..!!
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१२ लाख..!!

१५ लाख..!!

गोलू हे ऐकून अचंबित होतो आणि विचारतो “या खटारा गाडीचे एवढे पैसे का...??”

विक्रेता : अहो या गाडीचे आत्तापर्यंत कमीत कमी १० अपघात झाले आहेत आणि प्रत्येक वेळी नेमका बायकोचाच अपघातात मृत्यू होतो...!!!

गोलू: २० लाख...!!!

Santabanta

Banta: Mujhe 200 Rs De Do. Santa: R Tujhe Rupaye Ki Nahi, Akal Ki

Zaroorat Hai. Bnt: Magar Main Aapse Wahi Cheez 2 Mangoonga, Jo Apke Paas H.

Mitri

Maitri Ek Sparsh
Jivnacha

Maitri Ek Bandh
Naatyacha

Maitri Ek Swarg
an
Mitra Tya
Swargacha
Indra.

Die

One day when i will die,,, Will u miss me...??
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Yes,
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sO nice,
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to abhi bhi kar liya karo,
mere mrne k intzar me hi baithe ho kya?

Golf

"GOLF"

Bewkufo Ka Khel Hai

"Danda Haath Me,

Aur Ball Hole Me"

Game ka Maza to

tab aataa hai,

Jab ball  ( . (( . ( Haath Mei
Aur Danda Hole Mei ho

Google search

Hum ne unse pucha ki vaado aur yaado me kya fark he?
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wo bole
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"Bhai mere ko nahi pata,tu google pe search kar le".

Hair removal

Dear hair removal commercials,
stop shaving hairless legs..,
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If you want to impress us, please shave a gorilla..

Videsi channel

Banta: Santa! Tum Har Wakt Videshi Channel Kyo Dekhte Ho?

Santa: Main Isliye Dekhta Hu Ki Kuchh Bijli Unki Bhi To Kharch Ho.

Kaal

Sir: Kaal Kiti Prakarche Astat

Boy: 3 Astat

Sir: Udaharan De

Boy: Kaal Tumchi Mulgi Baghitli
Aaj Patavnaar
Udya Palvun Nenar.

Prem

Ti Hi Baghte Mi Hi Baghto
Shabdavinach Sare Khel Khelto
Tichya Najretla Najar Aata Haluch Hokarat Badltoy
Karan Tichyahi Manaat Kahi Tari Aahe.

Divas

Aayushyatil Dukha:che Divas Visrun Jave

Pan

Aayushyatil Jya Divasani

Tumhala BharBharun Dile

Te Divas Visru Naye.

Gentle

Wife: What Will You Give Me If I Successfully Climb & Reach The Top Of The Great Mt.Everest..
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Husband: A Gentle Push..;-)

Timepass

Ka kdhi Ayushya zurat jagav Lagt?

MANAT Dukh pn othavr Hasu

Anav Lagt khup Mnapasun Hvi Aste EkhadiGosht Jivnat Pn

HasatHast Tila Dur Krav lagt.

Charges to marry

A Little Boy asked his Father "Daddy, How much does it cost 2 get married"
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Father Replied "I Dont Know Son, I'm Still Paying" haha..lolz..

Pati aur t-shirt

Raat me pati ke chikne par biwi boli-Kya Huwa

Pati Gusse Me-Meri Shirt Gir Gayi
Biwi-To chilla Q rahe ho

Pati-Us shirt me mai bhi tha..,

Bijli

Banta: Santa! Tum Har Wakt Videshi Channel Kyo Dekhte Ho?
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Santa: Main Isliye Dekhta Hu Ki Kuchh Bijli Unki Bhi To Kharch Ho.

Kaal

Sir: Kaal Kiti Prakarche Astat

Boy: 3 Astat

Sir: Udaharan De

Boy: Kaal Tumchi Mulgi Baghitli
Aaj Patavnaar
Udya Palvun Nenar.

-chaitanya

Wife's gift

Wife: What Will You Give Me If I Successfully Climb & Reach The Top Of The Great Mt.Everest..
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Husband: A Gentle Push..;-)